DESIGNS FOR DISCOVERY

JAY P MITCHELL

THE MARRIAGE CEREMONY

THE WEDDING CAKE

PARTY FAVORS

THEIR NEST EGG

JAY'S JOTTINGS...

TYLER AND MOLLY
Molly and Tyler married this Summer. Molly, our granddaughter, with Tyler's blessings, planned the ceremony and the reception without hiring professionals. Of course, I'm biased, but I say without exaggeration that it was one of the most beautiful and deeply moving weddings I've attended. This joyful event made me recall a passage from Dietrich Bonhoeffer that I read when I was a graduate student, 50 years ago. I decided to share that brief essay and several pictures with those who visit this web page.

It is right and proper for a bride and bridegroom to welcome and celebrate their wedding day with a unique sense of triumph. When all the difficulties, obstacles, hindrances, doubts, and misgivings have been, not made light of, but honestly faced and overcome – and it is certainly better not to take everything for granted – then both parties have indeed achieved the most import triumph of their lives. With the “Yes” that they have said to each other, they have by their free choice given a new direction to their lives; they have cheerfully and confidently defied all the uncertainties and hesitations with which, as they know, a lifelong partnership between two people is faced; and by their own free and responsible action they have conquered a new land to live in. Every wedding must be an occasion of joy that human beings can do such great things, that they have been given such immense freedom and power to take the helm in their life’s journey. The children of the earth are rightly proud of being allowed to take a hand in shaping their own destinies, and something of this pride must contribute to the happiness of a bride and bridegroom. We ought not to be in too much of a hurry here to speak piously of God’s will and guidance. It is obvious, and it should not be ignored, that it is your own very human wills that are at work here, celebrating their triumph; the course that you are taking at the outset is one that you have chosen for yourselves; what you have done and are doing is not, in the first place, something religious, but something quite secular. So you yourselves, and you alone, bear the responsibility for what no one can take from you; or, to put it more exactly, it is you, the bride and bridegroom, on whom the whole responsibility is laid for the success of your venture, with all the happiness that such responsibility involves. Unless you can boldly say today: “This is our resolve, our love, our way,” you are taking refuge in a false piety. “Iron and steel may pass away, but our love shall abide for ever.” That desire for earthly bliss, which you want to find in one another, and in which, to quote the medieval song, one is the comfort of the other both in body and in soul – that desire is justified before God and man (humankind). -- Dietrich Bonhoeffer